Fear: Feelings As Friends 3 of 3 blogs
My clients and I have been using this process for years to work through fears both big and small!
And now I am sharing it with you. Cause I love ya that much!! You are a valuable and worthy feisty soul who deserves to work with fear instead of being held back by it!
So February’s feeling is fear. If you haven’t seen the videos or read the other blogs you are welcome to catch them here: Video 1, Video 2, Blog 1, Blog 2.
Or todays work is also ok on it’s own. Keep scrolling for my 6 part process.
We’re going to go through a journaling/visualization exercise you can do.
I find people are thinkers or visualizers and this PDF will work for both.
If you haven’t already downloaded the PDF, it can be found here.
Ready to dive into the mindfulness exercise?
Acknowledge that fear is helpful. It warns us of danger and challenges.
But, fear left unchecked is going to turn into anxiety and it will eventually immobilize you.
Let’s love fear, as a gas gauge that lets us know that we might be out of gas.
Step 2 Ask yourself the following questions:
2a. What is fear trying to tell me?
Take a deep breath as you sink into that. There’s no hurry. You can ask this question as many times as you need to.
2b. What am I avoiding?
Oh, I always hate this question because I’m usually avoiding lots but I sit with it, I look at the question and I let it really sink into my cells and I allow myself to express myself vulnerably because that is super helpful.
2c. How can I ground in my body here and now?
Now, usually by that time I ask myself: “what am I avoiding,” I actually start to feel “myself”: because I’m holding space for myself to ground into what’s going on in me and I’m actually really offering myself a lot of self compassion. I start to sink into my being, my body and into the here and now.
Acknowledge that the here and now is all that we have.
Fear about the future needs to be grounded into our present circumstances and what we can control now.
Once more: fear about the future needs to be grounded into our present circumstances.
Fear is really us getting ahead of ourselves on the timeline of life. We’re looking forward into areas that we’re not even living in.
Gosh-it just makes no sense but we do it all the time! We really need to acknowledge that the here and now is all we have.
If you were sitting with me in my office, I would say, “look do you need anything else right now?” And the cool thing in my office is that I have chocolate, tea and water– so I have food and water PLUS I have blankets and all sorts of things that could comfort us even if we did actually need something else, right in that moment. I have it there.
I think that’s probably what you’ll find as you get more centered and more grounded working through this PDF: that you have that too.
Everything you need right now is here.
And if that changes, you change.
We want to make a list that you could put up on your fridge, in your bathroom or in your journal so that when fear hits, you embrace it as your friend.
And have a list of activities that bring you back into your body ready so you can do the actions.
I mentioned my favorite ones: walking, meditating, journaling… these all work really quickly.
Or just saying, “where’s your bum Casey?” grounds me into my first
chakra, so make a list: somethings might cost money, you could have a free list (walks, music, meditation, etc) and an expensive list (massage, therapy, etc).
We want to come into our body.
Did any of this bring you into the present moment?
If it hasn’t, what will bring you into the present moment?
This is a mindfulness exercise.
Knowing Your Focus:
What are the 3 things that I’m working on in life right now?
And which one of them am I working right now in the present moment?
Example: I’m writing and editing. I’m doing content creation. That is my present moment, not worrying about the future, not worrying about Friday. I’m “worried” or grounded in today.
What brings me into connection with source?
You are most likely drawn to the work that I do because you are a feisty soul and you haven’t given up on the Universe. You’re longing for that deep connection that helps you feel grounded and totally empowered as a spiritual being.
Intuitive exercises and visualizations to help you connect with source:
I do Oracle card readings, and walking in nature (very spiritual and helps me see the bigger picture, planting seeds and watching them grow) as my top two but there are way more. Brainstorm away!
- So make a list of actionable steps to help you with fear and get back into the now and your body.
- Next, reconnect yourself with the present moment.
- Then feel your source connection.
- Finally, make a plan to deal with your fear using the lists you’ve created.
Create a plan of action?
Check in with yourself is there anything you actually need to worry about now?
I.e. maybe you left the stove on and when you get back into the here and now (cuz you’ve dissipated the fear) you’re like, “oh yeah, I need to turn off the stove.” Or you forgot to buy milk or something like that and you’re like, “oh yeah, not a huge worry,” but it was bugging you. Then what action could you take to alleviate that worry? Well, shut off the stove or buy milk! Super easy.Now you might have a bigger worry once you do all this grounding and centering energy that gets you back into your first chakra.
You might say:
- I need closure on this relationship or
- I need to balance my books or
- I need to purge that closet that I’ve been avoiding or
- I need let go of all that stuff that I was hanging on to for my ex
Beautiful feisty: let’s use this brilliant time you’ve spent doing this worksheet to really connect with yourself and take that next step from your comfort zone into that unknown and into that new space of growth and healing.
I hope this mini workshop and worksheet has been helpful for you.
Use this exercise and PDF as many times as you need to.
It takes practice to learn to work with fear as a friend. It is well worth it. Eventually it becomes a body memory and much easier. I have used it with death, breakups, teenagers, challenges with work and more!
If you like this and know a friend who’s been stuck in fear, this may be the answer to their prayers, please share it. As one big hearted friend of mine says, “sharing is caring!!”